Jesse the Body
Was a wrestlin, actin' man
With his big bald head
and very loud voice
he had himself a plan

Jesse the Body
cannot win the pundits say
He is way too course
and only a source
of jokes on election day

There must have been some cheating
when they counted up the votes
cause the next morning the Star Tribune
was filled with winning Jesse quotes

Oh Jesse the Body
Had won now, can't they see?
And the people say
that he's here to stay
and he talks like you and me

Thumpetty thump thump
Thumpety thump thump
Look at Jesse go
Thumpetty thump thump
Thumpety thump thump
To the mansion he does go

Jesse the Body
knew his plan for his first days
So he said, "Cheap tabs
no watercraft ban
is what we will do today"

Down to the capitol
holding a folding chair
Running here and there
all around the square saying
"Oppose me if you dare"

He led them to a tax rebate
Already a priority
When the people got their checks
he said, "It's because of me"

For Jesse the Body
is not going to campaign
If they don't vote him in
he'll return to the ring
and go back to causing pain

Thumpetty thump thump
Thumpety thump thump
Look at Jesse go
Thumpetty thump thump
Thumpety thump thump
Into history he'll go