File Generated 12/28/04 12:43:38

Average Active Points by Position per Game

Opponent Averages Report Through Week 16


Game Results for Week 16
Souper Bowl Twelve
Injury Prone  66   Ebonic Plague  56

Consolation Bracket
Bar Stool Buddies  52   Couch Lovin Mammals  32
Hi Definition Weasels  37   Sewage Serpents  25


Schedule for Week 17
The Sooner Biffy Toilet Bowl
Hi Definition Weasels (6-10) at Bar Stool Buddies (9-6)


                    Points Played Percentages
Team Name                           Possible  Actual  Points  Percentage Games
                                    Points    Points  Lost    Played     Played
Ebonic Plague                        949       840     109     88.51%      16
Catholic Nun and the Posse           718       613     105     85.38%      14
Lay Z Boy                            804       686     118     85.32%      15
Hi Definition Weasels                941       802     139     85.23%      16
Couch Lovin Mammals                  844       719     125     85.19%      16
River Lake Stars                     954       785     169     82.29%      15
Sewage Serpents                      976       799     177     81.86%      15
Bar Stool Buddies                    994       807     187     81.19%      15
Injury Prone                        1034       829     205     80.17%      16
Electric Donkey Bottom Biters        737       578     159     78.43%      14


                    Average Active Points by Position per Game
Team Name                          QB     RB  WR/TE SPE TEAM    DEF    TOTAL
Sewage Serpents                  7.13  14.20  18.93     8.00   5.00    53.27
River Lake Stars                 8.87  14.53  18.53     5.20   5.20    52.33
Couch Lovin Mammals              7.44  17.13  10.13     6.50   3.75    44.94
Bar Stool Buddies               12.67  11.20  16.40     7.73   5.80    53.80
Lay Z Boy                        8.40  17.80   9.67     5.73   4.13    45.73
Electric Donkey Bottom Biters    8.14  10.14  13.86     6.21   2.93    41.29
Catholic Nun and the Posse       6.07  12.36  11.43     9.93   4.00    43.79
Ebonic Plague                   14.44  11.25  15.50     7.31   4.00    52.50
Injury Prone                     9.69  15.94  14.88     7.94   3.38    51.81
Hi Definition Weasels           16.31  12.31  12.38     5.00   4.13    50.13
LEAGUE AVERAGES                 10.01  13.73  14.16     6.93   4.23    49.07



Opponent Averages Report Through Week 16
                       Average   Opponent Avg  Opponent Actual   Points
Team Name            Points/Game  Points/Game    Points/Game   From Average
Injury Prone            51.81        48.56          44.75         -3.81
Lay Z Boy               45.73        49.31          45.67         -3.64
Sewage Serpents         53.27        48.30          46.67         -1.63
Ebonic Plague           52.50        49.54          48.56         -0.97
Hi Definition Weasel    50.13        48.88          47.94         -0.95
Catholic Nun and the    43.79        49.40          49.14         -0.26
Electric Donkey Bott    41.29        50.14          50.79          0.64
Bar Stool Buddies       53.80        48.63          51.93          3.30
River Lake Stars        52.33        48.83          52.20          3.37
Couch Lovin Mammals     44.94        49.17          53.25          4.08



	
		

Injury Prone packers overcome Ebonic Plague to win Souper Bowl

Culpepper can't match Driver and Longwell 
		


In an entertaining,  closely fought game,  Injury Prone (11-4-1) stayed helathy and captured their first
 Souper Bowl crown.  Youth prevailed over experience at the wide receiver position as the Prone’s
 Burleson/ Driver combo were no match for the Holt / Horn tandem of wild card, Ebonic Plague (9-7). 

After drinking from the Bill Goldsworthy Cup, elated Prone, Snake Plummer caught everyone off guard
 when he gushed, ”If this is the league’s last season, I’m glad this team won it instead of one of
 the “Old Burnsville Boys”  or “Mark’s Former Coworkers”  teams (see side bar).  The impressive road
 run for the Ebs came up one game short of a championship. “I’m proud of this team.  The press has
 been against us and …" blah blah, other paranoid chatter. 

Meanwhile, the consolation rounds continued, setting up next week’s Toilet Bowl.

(continued on next page)
 

League Future in Doubt

Despite the sudden larynix injury to Plummer shortly after his comments and vehement denials by
 league officials, an RABEFL News investigative reporter has learned that this may have been the
 last season. Disgruntled former employees of the RABEFL have revealed many interesting facts,
 many of which are probably made up. 

According to these unauthenticated sources, the league has
 lost money four of the five last years and the owner, a multi-millionaire at the peak of the .com era,
 is now a recluse, holed up in a tin shack in Oklahoma. The palatial RABEFL headquarters building
 may be sold to MXBob.Com Enterprises and all employees have been laid off. “Your sources are dangerous
 psychopaths” claimed the current league spokesman, “We have pictures of them being cruel to animals
 and old people.”

		
	
	 
Injury Prone  66   Ebonic Plague  56
	
		Ebonic Plague
	at
		Injury Prone
	
	
		Active Players
	
	
		QB
		 Culpepper, Daunte
		 VIKS
		 16
		  
		QB
		 Plummer, Jake
		 BRNC
		 13
	
	
		RB
		 Jones, Julius
		 CWBY
		 1
		  
		RB
		 Dillon, Corey
		 PATS
		 3
	
	
		RB
		 Jones, Kevin
		 LION
		 10
		  
		RB
		 James, Edgerrin
		 COLT
		 6
	
	
		WR
		 Fitzgerald, Larry
		 CARD
		 14
		  
		WR
		 Bruce, Isaac
		 RAMS
		 9
	
	
		WR
		 Holt, Torry
		 RAMS
		 3
		  
		WR
		 Burleson, Nate
		 VIKS
		 10
	
	
		WR
		 Horn, Joe
		 SNTS
		 3
		  
		WR
		 Driver, Donald
		 PCKR
		 12
	
	
		PK
		 Team PK, CHFS
		 CHFS
		 7
		  
		PK
		 Team PK, PCKR
		 PCKR
		 11
	
	
		DF
		 Team Defense, EAGL
		 EAGL
		 2
		  
		DF
		 Team Defense, CHFS
		 CHFS
		 2
	
	
		Reserve Players
	
	
		QB
		 Carr, David
		 TEXN
		 5
		  
		QB
		 Bulger, Marc
		 RAMS
		 7
	
	
		RB
		 Barlow, Kevan
		 49RS
		 8
		  
		QB
		 Green, Trent
		 CHFS
		 11
	
	
		RB
		 Jackson, Steven
		 RAMS
		 11
		  
		RB
		 Dunn, Warrick
		 FALC
		 11
	
	
		RB
		 Smith, Emmitt
		 CARD
		 2
		  
		WR
		 Chambers, Chris
		 DLPN
		 1
	
	
		WR
		 Clayton, Michael
		 BUCS
		 14
		  
		WR
		 Mason, Derrick
		 TITN
		 2
	
	
		TE
		 Johnson, Eric
		 49RS
		 0
		  
		PK
		 Team PK, BUCS
		 BUCS
		 2
	
	 
	 
	
		
Consolation Round (continued)

 Sooner Biffy has
 jumped on board as the title sponsor and will demo at the game, for the first time ever, their new
 20 stall, handicap accessible unit. The first team to make it to the big game was Bar Stool
 Buddies (9-6), the number two seed that lost after the bye. Couch Lovin’ Mammals (5-10-1) played like
 the number nine seed they are and said ba-bye to their season.
(continued on next page)



		Bar Stool Buddies  52   Couch Lovin Mammals  32
		
	
	 
	
		Couch Lovin Mammals
	at
		Bar Stool Buddies
	
	
		Active Players
	
	
		QB
		 Leftwich, Byron
		 JGRS
		 -1
		  
		QB
		 McNabb, Donovan
		 EAGL
		 4
	
	
		RB
		 Green, Ahman
		 PCKR
		 9
		  
		RB
		 Goings, Nick
		 PTHR
		 6
	
	
		RB
		 Martin, Curtis
		 JETS
		 2
		  
		RB
		 McGahee, Willis
		 BILL
		 15
	
	
		WR
		 Gardner, Rod
		 SKNS
		 1
		  
		WR
		 Harrison, Marvin
		 COLT
		 4
	
	
		WR
		 Johnson, Andre
		 TEXN
		 7
		  
		WR
		 Moss, Randy
		 VIKS
		 7
	
	
		WR
		 Moulds, Eric
		 BILL
		 3
		  
		WR
		 Smith, Rod
		 BRNC
		 8
	
	
		PK
		 Team PK, VIKS
		 VIKS
		 7
		  
		PK
		 Team PK, SEAH
		 SEAH
		 6
	
	
		DF
		 Team Defense, GIAN
		 GIAN
		 4
		  
		DF
		 Team Defense, RAVN
		 RAVN
		 2
	
	
		Reserve Players
	
	
		QB
		 Hasselbeck, Matt
		 SEAH
		 0
		  
		QB
		 Brooks, Aaron
		 SNTS
		 11
	
	
		QB
		 McNair, Steve
		 TITN
		 0
		  
		RB
		 Davenport, Najeh
		 PCKR
		 1
	
	
		RB
		 Davis, Domanick
		 TEXN
		 13
		  
		RB
		 Jones, Thomas
		 BEAR
		 4
	
	
		RB
		 Taylor, Chester
		 RAVN
		 0
		  
		WR
		 McCardell, Keenan
		 CHGR
		 0
	
	
		WR
		 Morgan, Quincy
		 CWBY
		 0
		  
		TE
		 Graham, Daniel
		 PATS
		 7
	
	
		WR
		 Toomer, Amani
		 GIAN
		 1
		  
		PK
		 Team PK, RAVN
		 RAVN
		 1
	
	 
	 
	
		
Consolation Round (continued)

In the other side of the bracket, Hi Definition Weasels (6-10) won again, launching the number ten
 seed into the Toilet Bowl. “After losing four games when we scored more than 60, we deserve to win 
 with 37”, one Def waxed. The meager 25 point output put an exclamation point on the complete collapse
 of number one seed, Sewage Serpents (10-5).


		Hi Definition Weasels  37   Sewage Serpents  25
		
	
	 
	
		Hi Definition Weasels
	at
		Sewage Serpents
	
	
		Active Players
	
	
		QB
		 Manning, Peyton
		 COLT
		 13
		  
		QB
		 Vick, Michael
		 FALC
		 0
	
	
		RB
		 Barber, Tiki
		 GIAN
		 10
		  
		RB
		 Blaylock, Derrick
		 CHFS
		 0
	
	
		RB
		 Portis, Clinton
		 SKNS
		 1
		  
		RB
		 Taylor, Fred
		 JGRS
		 0
	
	
		WR
		 Houshmandzadeh, T.J.
		 BNGL
		 2
		  
		WR
		 Robinson, Marcus
		 VIKS
		 0
	
	
		WR
		 Smith, Jimmy
		 JGRS
		 0
		  
		WR
		 Walker, Javon
		 PCKR
		 9
	
	
		TE
		 Shockey, Jeremy
		 GIAN
		 2
		  
		WR
		 Williams, Roy
		 LION
		 1
	
	
		PK
		 Team PK, 49RS
		 49RS
		 1
		  
		PK
		 Team PK, PATS
		 PATS
		 11
	
	
		DF
		 Team Defense, VIKS
		 VIKS
		 8
		  
		DF
		 Team Defense, PATS
		 PATS
		 4
	
	
		Reserve Players
	
	
		QB
		 Favre, Brett
		 PCKR
		 17
		  
		QB
		 Bledsoe, Drew
		 BILL
		 6
	
	
		RB
		 Pinner, Artose
		 LION
		 0
		  
		RB
		 George, Eddie
		 CWBY
		 0
	
	
		WR
		 Givens, David
		 PATS
		 2
		  
		RB
		 Holmes, Priest
		 CHFS
		 0
	
	
		WR
		 Stallworth, Donte'
		 SNTS
		 8
		  
		WR
		 Owens, Terrell
		 EAGL
		 0
	
	
		TE
		 Mili, Itula
		 SEAH
		 0
		  
		TE
		 Wiggins, Jermaine
		 VIKS
		 1
	
	
		PK
		 Team PK, LION
		 LION
		 14
		  
		PK
		 Team PK, COLT
		 COLT
		 14

Injury Prone packers overcome Ebonic Plague to win Souper Bowl Culpepper can't match Driver and Longwell
In an entertaining, closely fought game, Injury Prone (11-4-1) stayed helathy and captured their first Souper Bowl crown. Youth prevailed over experience at the wide receiver position as the Prone’s Burleson/ Driver combo were no match for the Holt / Horn tandem of wild card, Ebonic Plague (9-7). After drinking from the Bill Goldsworthy Cup, elated Prone, Snake Plummer caught everyone off guard when he gushed, ”If this is the league’s last season, I’m glad this team won it instead of one of the “Old Burnsville Boys” or “Mark’s Former Coworkers” teams (see side bar). The impressive road run for the Ebs came up one game short of a championship. “I’m proud of this team. The press has been against us and …" blah blah, other paranoid chatter. Meanwhile, the consolation rounds continued, setting up next week’s Toilet Bowl. (continued on next page)					League Future in Doubt Despite the sudden larynix injury to Plummer shortly after his comments and vehement denials by league officials, an RABEFL News investigative reporter has learned that this may have been the last season. Disgruntled former employees of the RABEFL have revealed many interesting facts, many of which are probably made up. According to these unauthenticated sources, the league has lost money four of the five last years and the owner, a multi-millionaire at the peak of the .com era, is now a recluse, holed up in a tin shack in Oklahoma. The palatial RABEFL headquarters building may be sold to MXBob.Com Enterprises and all employees have been laid off. “Your sources are dangerous psychopaths” claimed the current league spokesman, “We have pictures of them being cruel to animals and old people.”

Injury Prone 66 Ebonic Plague 56
Ebonic Plague				at	Injury Prone
Active Players
QB	Culpepper, Daunte	VIKS	16		QB	Plummer, Jake	BRNC	13
RB	Jones, Julius	CWBY	1		RB	Dillon, Corey	PATS	3
RB	Jones, Kevin	LION	10		RB	James, Edgerrin	COLT	6
WR	Fitzgerald, Larry	CARD	14		WR	Bruce, Isaac	RAMS	9
WR	Holt, Torry	RAMS	3		WR	Burleson, Nate	VIKS	10
WR	Horn, Joe	SNTS	3		WR	Driver, Donald	PCKR	12
PK	Team PK, CHFS	CHFS	7		PK	Team PK, PCKR	PCKR	11
DF	Team Defense, EAGL	EAGL	2		DF	Team Defense, CHFS	CHFS	2
Reserve Players
QB	Carr, David	TEXN	5		QB	Bulger, Marc	RAMS	7
RB	Barlow, Kevan	49RS	8		QB	Green, Trent	CHFS	11
RB	Jackson, Steven	RAMS	11		RB	Dunn, Warrick	FALC	11
RB	Smith, Emmitt	CARD	2		WR	Chambers, Chris	DLPN	1
WR	Clayton, Michael	BUCS	14		WR	Mason, Derrick	TITN	2
TE	Johnson, Eric	49RS	0		PK	Team PK, BUCS	BUCS	2


Consolation Round (continued) Sooner Biffy has jumped on board as the title sponsor and will demo at the game, for the first time ever, their new 20 stall, handicap accessible unit. The first team to make it to the big game was Bar Stool Buddies (9-6), the number two seed that lost after the bye. Couch Lovin’ Mammals (5-10-1) played like the number nine seed they are and said ba-bye to their season. (continued on next page) Bar Stool Buddies 52 Couch Lovin Mammals 32

Couch Lovin Mammals				at	Bar Stool Buddies
Active Players
QB	Leftwich, Byron	JGRS	-1		QB	McNabb, Donovan	EAGL	4
RB	Green, Ahman	PCKR	9		RB	Goings, Nick	PTHR	6
RB	Martin, Curtis	JETS	2		RB	McGahee, Willis	BILL	15
WR	Gardner, Rod	SKNS	1		WR	Harrison, Marvin	COLT	4
WR	Johnson, Andre	TEXN	7		WR	Moss, Randy	VIKS	7
WR	Moulds, Eric	BILL	3		WR	Smith, Rod	BRNC	8
PK	Team PK, VIKS	VIKS	7		PK	Team PK, SEAH	SEAH	6
DF	Team Defense, GIAN	GIAN	4		DF	Team Defense, RAVN	RAVN	2
Reserve Players
QB	Hasselbeck, Matt	SEAH	0		QB	Brooks, Aaron	SNTS	11
QB	McNair, Steve	TITN	0		RB	Davenport, Najeh	PCKR	1
RB	Davis, Domanick	TEXN	13		RB	Jones, Thomas	BEAR	4
RB	Taylor, Chester	RAVN	0		WR	McCardell, Keenan	CHGR	0
WR	Morgan, Quincy	CWBY	0		TE	Graham, Daniel	PATS	7
WR	Toomer, Amani	GIAN	1		PK	Team PK, RAVN	RAVN	1


Consolation Round (continued) In the other side of the bracket, Hi Definition Weasels (6-10) won again, launching the number ten seed into the Toilet Bowl. “After losing four games when we scored more than 60, we deserve to win with 37”, one Def waxed. The meager 25 point output put an exclamation point on the complete collapse of number one seed, Sewage Serpents (10-5). Hi Definition Weasels 37 Sewage Serpents 25

Hi Definition Weasels				at	Sewage Serpents
Active Players
QB	Manning, Peyton	COLT	13		QB	Vick, Michael	FALC	0
RB	Barber, Tiki	GIAN	10		RB	Blaylock, Derrick	CHFS	0
RB	Portis, Clinton	SKNS	1		RB	Taylor, Fred	JGRS	0
WR	Houshmandzadeh, T.J.	BNGL	2		WR	Robinson, Marcus	VIKS	0
WR	Smith, Jimmy	JGRS	0		WR	Walker, Javon	PCKR	9
TE	Shockey, Jeremy	GIAN	2		WR	Williams, Roy	LION	1
PK	Team PK, 49RS	49RS	1		PK	Team PK, PATS	PATS	11
DF	Team Defense, VIKS	VIKS	8		DF	Team Defense, PATS	PATS	4
Reserve Players
QB	Favre, Brett	PCKR	17		QB	Bledsoe, Drew	BILL	6
RB	Pinner, Artose	LION	0		RB	George, Eddie	CWBY	0
WR	Givens, David	PATS	2		RB	Holmes, Priest	CHFS	0
WR	Stallworth, Donte'	SNTS	8		WR	Owens, Terrell	EAGL	0
TE	Mili, Itula	SEAH	0		TE	Wiggins, Jermaine	VIKS	1
PK	Team PK, LION	LION	14		PK	Team PK, COLT	COLT	14